The author of this blog in the Huffington Post was told the following by his father:
“Seth, you’re being totally selfish. So I’m going to make this really simple: marriage isn’t for you. You don’t marry to make yourself happy, you marry to make someone else happy. More than that, your marriage isn’t for yourself, you’re marrying for a family. Not just for the in-laws and all of that nonsense, but for your future children. Who do you want to help you raise them? Who do you want to influence them? Marriage isn’t for you. It’s not about you. Marriage is about the person you married.”
I’m gay, my boyfriend and I are very happy together. We talked about marriage once or twice and quickly came to the conclusion it was not for us, even just becoming legal in California. We both have jobs, both support ourselves, and both have separate savings.
I can totally see this article making sense…100 years ago. It’s almost 2014, get with the times people! Marriage is now a total scam, ZERO benefit. Thanks for keeping us sharp Professor.
So often marriage is about what each partner can exact from the other that they can not necessarily exact from themselves, but then there too comes a time when if both parties are willing to listen to each other and agree to carry each other’s burdens, aspirations and struggles that love can move forward.
The question then might be at what point do we as partners lose sight of our partners needs and make our own paramount? A question each partner from time to time come to wonder about the other…